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Dear Issa Rae

I'm watching two HBO shows right now--"Insecure" and "Sharp Objects"--and I can't help but notice how much more brilliant and vital "Insecure" is. Not that there is a competition. And of course "Sharp Objects" gives us the great gift that is Amy Adams. But still. Some thoughts.

-Language. Is there a writer on TV who loves words as much as Issa Rae loves words? It doesn't matter what the plot is; you just become giddy because of the use of English. "I see you," "I've been saving, I've been saving, I've been saving," "It was a nebulous fuck," "Party Lyft," "We Got Y'All," "I didn't do *shit* to your vase," "ho-tation," "Are you thirsty? For a drink?" -- This is the work of a poet. Issa Rae makes me think of Alison Bechdel. When Bechdel was getting started on "Dykes to Watch Out For," she said her aim was to introduce the world to her lesbian friends, because she loved them, and she wanted the world to love them. I think Issa Rae is doing something similar. When asked, recently, which people she wanted to win at an awards ceremony, she said, with typical acuity, "I'm rooting for the black people. I want the black people to win." And when asked which of her cast-mates she desired, romantically, she said, "All of them. Boys. Girls. I am thirsty."

-The working world. How many other shows attempt to address clumsy social-justice efforts by people in their twenties? I'm fascinated by "We Got Y'all." Part of me resists the idea that the older white woman who runs the organization would choose such an obviously racist logo, and would get so defensive when her logo was challenged. But, then: I don't know. "Prep for Prep"? Isn't that phrase a bit condescending? It seems to me that any effort to "level the playing field" is going to run into awkwardness, because the world is simply broken. And maybe this should be the name of all social-justice organizations. "The World Is Simply Broken." This might be less patronizing for young students; it would be a cool splash of reality; and it would introduce children to the idea of "gallows humor." (The show that "Insecure" reminds me of, most consistently, is "Girls," and "Girls" *did* play with the idea of under-qualified twenty-somethings trying to "help" the "younger generation." It had Jessa murmuring about her little toddler client, "She's so resilient. I mean, I kicked her in the head, and she didn't even mind. Wonderful girl." And it had Hannah lecturing, absurdly, to a group of eighth graders: "This Roth novel will help you to see that a certain kind of male in his twenties is both narcissistic and deeply childish, and that he really just wants to fuck his mother.")

-Shades of grey. Relationships rarely have clean "start" and "end" points, particularly when the players are overgrown stooges in their twenties, and, like "Girls," "Insecure" plays with this idea in a skillful way. It seems to me Issa Rae took some time and brainstormed two of the most awkward romantic situations she could imagine. (1) A woman is deeply, erotically connected to a man who claims to be in an open marriage, and that adjective, "open," torments her for weeks. (2) A woman sleeps with a man, then insists things remain platonic, but then also asks to sleep in the man's apartment for several weeks, because she can't pay the rent. These situations take me right back to my twenties, when my boyfriend really wanted to be polyamorous, and encouraged me to read "The Ethical Slut." I also recall the comically awkward breakup, in which he remained in my apartment while sending Facebook updates about his new single status and pursuing the sexual attentions of an ex. And part of the dubious pleasure of being in your twenties is not yet having the self-knowledge or confidence to say, "This won't stand"--or to say it clearly, on a regular basis. So you find yourself saying "yes" to things that are really, obviously unacceptable. And then the other person recognizes his advantage, and he makes use of it as much as possible. "Insecure" shows this, again and again, beautifully, with clumsy, endearing Issa and her struggles. I very rarely have trouble putting myself in her shoes, because, to some extent, they are already my shoes.

-The rise of Daniel. I also love the awful men in this show. I miss Lawrence, even though he was a dick. I empathized with his workplace trials--working up the oomph even to consider presenting your app idea, let alone going ahead with the presentation. Enduring false enthusiasm: "I love your sneakers!" I also love that Lawrence did terrible things within relationships, then had to live with the consequences. The writers did not ask you to adore or worship Lawrence in every scene. Who, in their twenties, hasn't treated a romantic partner like shit, and hasn't justified that behavior with some kind of half-assed, lazy rationalization? "Insecure" knows we've all done this, and it makes us "sit with" that knowledge. Also, I was moved, in the last episode, by Daniel's struggle even to introduce himself to a more successful artist. Daniel has a gift--but he has not learned to promote himself. We see him wrestling with questions of entitlement and chutzpah. I will be happy to follow him this season.

Are you watching yet? Do you think Issa-and-Daniel will work? What will be Issa's fate at "We Got Y'All"? (I'm not optimistic, but then why devote so much time to this setting if Issa is just going to leave?) And will the Issa/Molly friendship deepen this season, or will we see them separately, more and more? Will we revisit the discussion about the vase (which I loved)? Your thoughts, please!

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