*My shrink recommends a healthy attitude toward bodily functions. "The baby's poop is a gift to you," he says. "Don't forget. An offering! Celebrate the poop!" When his own children ask about death, my shrink becomes very serious. "I will continue to fart after death, " he says, "but my farts will travel everywhere . All over the cosmos!" *"The Happiest Baby on the Block" suggests that if you swaddle too loosely, the baby will wriggle out of the cloth, and then maybe fall prey to SIDS. ("Don't worry," says the writer, in a not very reassuring tone. "Most studies say that if the blanket is very thin, then SIDS won't happen. Probably babies die only when the blanket is a bit too heavy!") The book goes on: "Don't make the swaddle too tight. If it's too tight, the baby's legs will suffer. You'll be looking at hip dysplasia, somewhere down the road." *My mother has advice,...