Liars and Saints

  Part of Cardi B's gift is an ability to look closely at her own character: Last time you fucked up, said I was done Fucked up again, I took you back, shit, I was dumb I held back for you, was really biting my tongue Should've fell back from you, instead,   I gave you a son I don't regret it, it's a blessin', just know I learned my lesson So stop with all that calling me and textin' All the times you say you was locked in Late-night sessions,   only thing that need to drop is your confessions *** ga, I believed you, don't know if I'm mad at me or you Once upon a time, I thought I needed you Even though I'm up, I always treat you like we even, dude See what special treatment do? Huh, I could've cheated too While anatomizing her marriage, Cardi B recognizes that she herself has been dumb. As her spouse misbehaves, Cardi B rewards bad moves "with a son." Cardi B is aware that she is better at her job, but she meekly hides the evidence. ...

I wander around the gym with my favorite Kindergarten student, and we notice different colors . "Look, that shirt is red." "And those sweatpants are green." This seems to be immensely satisfying to my friend, and then her sullen "mood" is over. Here is how to impress middle school students. They will want to investigate your knowledge of trivia. They will ask: "What is Cardi B's first name?" Here's what to say: "I don't know, but I DO know this. Cardi B was originally 'Bacardi.' But the liquor company threatened to sue her. So she changed the syllables around." THIS will win you street cred. One teacher is always ill. It's not as if all teachers take the same number of sick days. The perpetually-ill teacher has announced he is not returning next year; this decision seems to have emboldened him. He is now sick, and sick, and sick again. His students have a wild look in their eyes, as if they were newly orpha...