My neighbor is like an alien to me; it's like I'm talking to someone who does not belong to my own species. "I have a friend," he says. "He's gay, too. He invited me to Saint Lucie for a few days, for a gay party cruise. And I thought about it. I really thought about it. But I'm nearing fifty, and my body is not what it was; I know I would just feel self-conscious...." I nod politely. I cannot begin to imagine a universe in which I would entertain a request from a "gay party cruise," and the idea of really weighing the decision seems comical to me. It's like if someone said, "Do you want me to pluck out your eyes and skewer them, and then roast each of your inner organs on a campfire?" ...and I said, "I'm not sure. I really need to think about this...." My neighbor (bearing gifts) is possibly Joshua's favorite person. Joshua tears open one gift--a "home edition" of Whack-a-Mole--and begins to att...