August With Children

 One thing I really loathe is "special outfit" day. This seems like the laziest possible option for educators.

It's heavily abused at my son's school. Almost every other day is "wear green to show your spirit!" day. I assume other parents just ignore this bizarre request, but because I have an anxiety disorder, I try to hit every mark. A part of my brain believes that the sky will fall if my kid fails to wear green when green is mandated. Other days are "pajama days," which my son understandably rejects. His policy is this: "Why the fuck should I wear pajamas on the bus?" Then I find myself texting the teacher, in shame, to explain that PJs will not be materializing. I went to graduate school for this?

My daughter's camp counselor had initially planned to make this current week "science week," but I suspect she is fighting seasonal allergies, because she just made a last-minute change. Instead of conducting experiments, the children of Maplewood will spend this week dressing in "outlandish costumes"--! We've had hat day and--you guessed it--pajama day. Now we're celebrating "early Halloween." It's not clear what my daughter gets out of this. She does not plan or execute the costume; she doesn't offer "jewelry input." I look out at the sea of stressed, semi-miserable moms, making half-hearted exclamations ("a Waldo! so cute!")--and I try to silence my own chattering brain.

Can you guess what would inspire me to stage my own "Spirit Week"? Knowing that I will have childcare for the last week of August--knowing that the camp counselors won't just give up. But there is no childcare for the last week of August. Now show your spirit!