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Ann Leary on Marriage

 Ann Leary writes very well about her marriage, and her secret involves metaphors. The first is a tennis metaphor. (Ann always loses because her spouse, Denis, manipulates the rules.)


When the children came along, we got caught up in the tallying of efforts, the scorekeeping of who was doing more for the marriage and family and who was being self-serving, disapproving. Somewhere along the line we had entered a silent competition.....in which we were opponents....

Then--a surprise, so random that it must come from actual life:

One of the movies we saw was "March of the Penguins." This movie moved us to tears because, whatever battles raged between us, we had these two very delicate fledglings that needed to be protected....carried along carefully.....because is anything more fragile than a preteen girl or a growing boy?

When there is an (apparently) final rupture, Leary uses "sartorial" language (another surprise):

I decided to serve up my final grievances, the things he needed to know to understand that he was the cause of our marriage's end....

These were the wretched rags of resentment so bitter and old that I had been ashamed to mention them in therapy...so now I balled them up and tossed them onto Dennis's court.

This isn't elaborately "lyrical" writing. The use of poetic techniques is modest. You get the impression of a speaker who is both graceful and blunt. It's a pleasure to spend time with her.
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