Skip to main content

Shakira

One treat from the half-time show was a renewed interest in "Hips Don't Lie."

This daffy song represents Shakira at the height of her powers.

A young gentleman admires Shakira's moves, and he exclaims:

She makes a man want to speak Spanish....

And he is then moved to attempt actual Spanish:

Como se llama....Bonita...Mi casa....Su casa....

This dazzling display arouses Shakira:


Oh, baby, when you talk like THAT....
You make a woman go mad!

And who could disagree?


Probably the gentleman doesn't *need* to learn Spanish; Shakira has a MENSA-level IQ, and she is obviously bilingual, at the least. (Something tells me she knows *more* than two languages.)

All this flirtation leads to a culminating metaphor--one of the great metaphors of the past few decades: "I'm on tonight....My hips don't lie, and I'm starting to feel it's right....The attraction! The tension! Don't you see, Baby, this is perfection!"

Shakira's hips--blessed with a mind of their own--have announced God's plans for the evening. "Be wise. Keep on reading the signs of my body."

This isn't Sondheim, but I'm never unhappy to hear "Hips Don't Lie." The blaring trumpet, the dramatic and weird background noise ("No fighting!") -- a masterwork from the recent musical past.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

How to Host a Baby

-You have assumed responsibility for a mewling, puking ball of life, a yellow-lab pup. He will spit his half-digested kibble all over your shoes, all over your hard-cover edition of Jennifer Haigh's novel  Faith . He will eat your tables, your chairs, your "I {Heart] Montessori" magnet, placed too low on the fridge. When you try to watch Bette Davis in  Hush Hush Sweet Charlotte , on your TV, your dog will bark through the murder-prologue, for no apparent reason. He will whimper through Lena Dunham's  Girls , such that you have to rewind several times to catch every nuance of Andrew Rannells's ad-libbing--and, still, you'll have a nagging suspicion you've missed something. Your dog will poop on the kitchen floor, in the hallway, between the tiny bars of his crate. He'll announce his wakefulness at 5 AM, 2 AM, or while you and another human are mid-coitus. All this, and you get outside, and it's: "Don't let him pee on my tulips!" When...

Joshie

  When I was growing up, a class birthday involved Hostess cupcakes. Often, the cupcakes would come in a shoebox, so you could taste a leathery residue (during the party). Times change. You can't bring a treat into a public school, in 2024, because heaven knows what kind of allergies might lurk, in unseen corners, in the classroom. But Joshua's teacher will allow: a dance party, a pajama day, or a guest reader. I chose to bring a story for Joshua's birthday (observed), but I didn't think through the role that anxiety might play in this interaction. We talk, in this house, quite a bit about anxiety; one game-changer, for J, has been a daily list of activities, so that he knows exactly what to expect. He gets a look of profound satisfaction when he sees the agenda; it doesn't really matter what the specific events happen to be. It's just about knowing, "I can anticipate X, Y, and Z." Joshua struggled with his celebration. He wore his nervousness on his f...

Josh at Five

 Joshie's project is "flexibility"; the goal is to see that a plan is just an idea, not a gospel, not a guarantee. This is difficult. Yesterday, we went to a restaurant--billed as "open," with unlocked doors--and the owner informed us of an "error in advertising." But Joshie couldn't accept the word "closed." He threw himself on the floor, then climbed on the furniture. I felt for the owner, until he nervously made a reference to "the glass windows." He imagined that my child might toss himself through a sealed window, like Mary Katherine Gallagher, or like Bruce Willis, in "Die Hard." Then--thank the Lord!--I was able to laugh. The thing that really has therapeutic value for Joshie is: a firetruck. If we are out in public, and he spots a parked truck, he wants to climb on each surface. He breathlessly alludes to the wheels, the door, the windows. If an actual fire station ("fire ocean," in Joshie's parla...