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On Marriage

 We're having Board of Ed elections here in Maplewood, and my husband has a grown-up approach; he calls and interviews the candidates, he posts a lawn sign, he daydreams about hosting a "meet-and-greet."


All this inspired me to listen, for a bit, to a debate--and I now think I'm making an informed decision. I do think I'm in a Christopher Guest movie, because the "bad" candidate has a sign that says: "Students COME first." I can't begin to imagine why--among words--the one you'd want to italicize is COME.

In the town square, Marc and I meet a rival political thinker. "I'd love to give you this flyer about Smith; it explains his sterling credentials...."

I shake my head firmly and say, "I'm good, thanks."

But Marc says, "Full disclosure: I'll be supporting the other candidate. Would you like to have a chat about that?"

I expect hits from "The Music Man" to start playing; red and blue balloons might sprout up from the ground. Daniel Day-Lewis might appear--in costume--to deliver the Gettysburg Address.

I grab my husband and whisper, "Talk less. Smile more. Don't let them know what you're against and what you're for...."

The lawn signs multiply; the term "bloodletting" pops up in conversation. Admiral Howe's got troops on the water.....
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