I have never attended a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous, but I've borrowed from the playbook. In a way, my approach to parenting resembles an AA meeting.
"First things first," I say to my son--as the bus approaches. "Easy does it." Neither Josh nor I really understand what I'm talking about--but the words seem to help.
In the eternal potty-training war, my shrink offers an interesting mantra: "Joshua, if you do poop in the potty, that's like a special gift to me. But, regardless of what happens, I love you so much. Poop or no poop--it really doesn't matter."
(This one requires some playacting. It soon morphs into its own weird shorthand. "No presh. Anything you choose is what I love." My son says this to me each morning, whether or not I myself have said it. It's almost like a little song he sings.)
A behavioral consultant recommends daily affirmations--in the Jack Handy tradition. "I'm good enough....I'm strong enough...." Josh enjoys these, too. "I'm kind. I'm a listener. I make my best effort. I can do hard things."
Josh repeats this. "I can do hard things." And he adds his own twist. "I can do hard PENIS."
He giggles--and heads to school.
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