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Jaafar Jackson: "Michael"

 This is an amazingly shallow movie -- it makes the Bobby Darrin musical look like Shakespeare. If you choose to make a film about a monster but overlook all the evidence of monstrosity, then you're severely limited on the job. The Ebert site's one-star rating seems generous. (That said, because the movie reproduces several of Michael's dance routines, the experience is ridiculously entertaining.)

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